Go horizontal, it looks bigger.

- NP, in regards to ad sizes

It makes me think that his cock has internet or something.

- KIIYP, in reaction to G.W.'s 'Sent from my i-thingy' email signature

So you can handle the seed but you can't handle the cream, huh?

- KIIYP, with regard to NP's failure to eat an entire creampuff

"Yep, that's what you just said... but of course, one comes with the other, so there we are."
- NP, wrapping up the conversation

You're such a makeout slut.

- MP, to KIIYP in regards to her receiving a facebook message from an old fling

Oh, well now I'm just flashing for no reason...

- NP, on her unladylike behavior induced by her legging-wearing

Oh, I would very much enjoy shoving the whole thing in my mouth.

- KIIYP, considering the large bite of Dobash cake that she was preparing to take

Anything that starts with P-E-N I like to keep warm.

- MP, regarding my stolen pen which he was keeping warm for KIIYP in his (shirt) pocket